*Newsflash* Life's Not Perfect!

We had Thanksgiving yesterday. I have so many things to be thankful for this year; from the birth of my healthy, beautiful daughter in August and the recovery of my brother Simon from a car accident in which he nearly died to 'simple' things that we all take for granted such as having good food to eat and hot running water every day.

I cooked a little more than I usually do yesterday. I wanted to make traditional candied yams, green bean casserole and pumpkin pie. These are not difficult to make and they were delicious, if I may say so myself! I enjoyed my moment of domesticity and could almost imagine myself a 'simple woman', if only for a day!

The strange thing was that I felt a little 'blue' in the evening. Maybe it was a little bit of an anti-climax after all the holiday preparations; maybe the post-baby hormones are still adjusting themselves. I'm happy in my new life with my husband and little Sophia. I like being in college. Sometimes though, I feel sad that I waited so long to have my family and to start the career of my choosing. I spent ten years of my life doing what other people thought was right for me. I thought they were showing me the 'right' way or the 'spiritual' way to do things, and that if I stepped outside of what they expected, I would suffer the consequences.
Sometimes I look in the mirror and say to myself, "Who are you trying to kid? You're too old to be trying to start your life again." Sometimes I think that I'm so far from where I 'should' be in my career and financially that it gets me down.

These are sad thoughts for a post-Thanksgiving holiday. I acknowledge them, I let myself feel the loss of time that slipped away like sand between my fingers. Of course I would like to have done things differently, but I didn't fully understand how time would fly for me as a woman. I thought I had all the time in the world ... I still haven't come to terms with it all. In the meantime, here are some thoughts from my photo journal:

This is my brother Si. In July this year he suffered a terrible car accident. This smile should be enough to blow all sad thoughts away. This year we toasted our thanks that Simon is still with us. I wrote the story of his accident here: http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendId=121048044&blogId=514196654

This is my daughter. How could any woman ask for more joy in her life !?! And this:

was our Thaksgiving turkey :D There are always reasons to be thankful, even though life's not always perfect.